During Perimenopause our bodies and minds can change so much and it forces us to look at our habits, health and mental health. It is an opportunity to identify what’s not working anymore and what other new things could benefit and nourish us. You might have an idea of something you’d like to change or work on or achieve, but getting there and mustering up the motivation to work on your goals can seem impossible sometimes. Here’s a few things that might help you get on that path….
1. First up, establish what your goal is and write it down. It should be your goal, not someone else’s idea or suggestion and must be personally motivating and in line with your values.
2. Next ask yourself whether you have a SMART goal. This acronym is a way of reminding yourself that goals should be….
Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Relevant
Time bound
An example of a SMART goal might be …
I’d like to get physically stronger ….
To make this more specific we could say I’d like to develop stronger leg muscles. To make it measurable I’ll record the size of the weights I’m using over time so that I can see my progress. So that it’s achievable I’ll aim to lift weights just slightly heavier than I’m currently able to lift. This goal is relevant because I’m Perimenopausal and I need to build muscle to stay healthy and I’ve joined a gym so need a purpose. I’ll aim to make this improvement in three weeks at which time I’ll set a new goal based on my progress so it’s time bound.
Because this is specific, time limited and achievable it’s going to keep me moving in the right direction, as opposed to having a general goal like I want to get fitter, which leaves me feeling a bit lost and lacking motivation. If I don’t chart my progress, I’ll have no way of seeing whether I am achieving my goal other than what I feel like, which is too vague and changeable.
If you’re goal is more psychological, for example to feel happier or better about myself, you might think this is trickier. It can be but the same principles apply. Try to narrow down what this would mean should it occur. This is a bit like the magic wand question. If you could wave a magic wand and tomorrow wake up happier, how would you know? What would you be doing that you’re not now. What would others see when they looked at you, that would show them that you feel better about yourself? What would your day look like? This helps to focus on what is objective, observable and measurable.
3. Plan your first step. Taking the first step is the start of your journey and is progress itself. The first step could simply be doing some research online eg to find clubs, information or advice around the activities you’ve chosen.
4. Breaking your overall goal down into chunks, makes it seem less daunting and more of an easy win. Wins are motivating and tap into our dopamine receptors in the brain boosting this feel good hormone. During peri menopause reduced oestrogen production impacts dopamine uptake from our already dopamine depleted brains. This can mean that motivation is low and so easy wins are essential to help us to keep going.
5. It’s a good idea, once you have established the what and the how, to think about the when. Having a plan or a bit of a timetable in place is more likely to work than simply leaving it up to seeing how you feel. If your goal is exercise or learning related, research shows that you might be best planning to do this in the morning, as this is when our motivation is highest and it then dwindles throughout the day. Research also shows that due to the number of decisions we make throughout the day, we experience decision fatigue nearer the end of the day. So seize the moment when you wake up and decide to work on your goal as it might become less likely to happen as the day goes on.
6. Celebrate and reward your progress. You could make sure that each week when you check your progress you reward yourself for keeping going. Don’t base this reward on the figures necessarily- instead reward the effort. Asking someone to buddy up or check in on your goals (eg personal trainer, coach or friend) can be a great source of motivation and support plus holds you accountable. Working together with a friend on a shared goal can be a great way to keep each other motivated.
7. Remember to be kind and compassionate to yourself as you work towards your goal. Don’t beat yourself up if you feel like you haven’t worked on it, or in the way you feel you should and instead look forward and reset. Put it back on the agenda and remind yourself of why it’s important and keep moving in that direction. Don’t give up and when you make progress, turn round and look at the view to remind yourself how far you’ve come ❤️
Sea change 